Wednesday Dec 19, just 2 days before my kids' Christmas vacation from school started, I had another one of those conferences at my 8 year old son's school with the teacher, the school nurse, the school social worker, special education teacher, speech therapist and autism resource specialist. I had met with this team twice in the past, giving them permission to meet with him, observe him in his class, interview previous teachers, etc. And I believed this would be another one of those follow up meetings. My husband didn't even come to this one. But this was the one where they all spent 90 minutes reading to me from their written notes, and all unanimously agreeing that although he is in the 97th percent of the school district's math and reading scores for 3rd graders in our school district, he qualifies for Special Education in the school district, for "autism spectrum disorder."
Most of their findings I already knew. He has a hard time sitting still, repeats himself, has a narrow range of interests, cries when the daily schedule is disrupted, and ignores people around him, including other children, often. But some of their findings such as some of his specific patterns of speech, his inability to figure out the meanings of figures of speech, and his anxiety of loud crowds I hadn't noticed at all until they all pointed it out to me. It made me mad because so often in the past I've tried to show some of his behaviors to his pediatrician, and was told he was just being a boy, or was making the mistake of comparing him to his sister. The school psychologist said she'd send a copy of their findings to his pediatrician to keep in his chart. I'd sort of preferred that they'd proven him right, though, than prove me right this time.
I was assured he'll be in the same class, take the same bus, his routine won't really change, but that by signing my agreement to allow him to participate in Special Education they can continue to provide all the same services they'd already been providing this year, but that the school district would be bound by law to continue to provide those services if any of them were replaced in their job at some point. And that we can meet again soon to develop an Individual Education Plan for him, that will apparently include giving him the right to leave class and have some designated place to go when the noise makes him too anxious, because apparently that was a major concern of all of theirs. In a way I feel very lucky about the school district, and the school that he is in. Some parents of some seriously disabled children have to fight for their child to have an I.E.P. We just got one handed to us.
Saturday Dec 22 we drove to Green Bay, and hit a blizzard half way there! Our usual 5 hour drive with both my husband I, both our children, and our shepherd mix dog in my Saturn Sedan, as great as my car now drives, took us 7 hours. So, we arrived Saturday night. But Christmas wasn't until Tuesday. My kids couldn't believe, then, that we had to go to their church on both Sunday AND the next day, which was Christmas Eve. Churches are rough on my son. He used to try to run away during it. Now he lays his head on my lap and pulls his coat up over his head. And I knitted a lot. I just finished knitting the last of my new 9 month old nephew's baby blanket when it was time for everyone to start opening presents.
At my in-laws', my husband and his 3 siblings and all their spouses draw one name from a bowl, and that's the one sibling they have to buy a present for. But everyone buys for my husband's mom and dad and for all the nieces and nephews. And his parents buy a lot for all their kids, kids' spouses, and grandchildren. My son got lots of Pokemon toys, and my daughter got a lot of shirts with dragons on them, and books of ghost stories. I got snowflake patterned pajamas, among some other things, and my husband got Green Bay Packers football shaped soap on a rope!
Wouldn't you know we hit another snow storm about half way back, Christmas night. We had to leave Christmas afternoon, because I had to work the next day. So our drive back took almost as long as our drive there. And, after we got back, my husband found that he had taken one of his father's boots rather than his own. They really did look a lot alike. But now he had two left boots, no right one, and his father's orthopedic insert, in one of them!
So we drove up to our own driveway at about 10:00 at night, and our kids got to open what we got them, the "big present" of which , this year, was a Nintendo Wii. They stayed up until 1 am trying to hook it up and play it. But they and my husband had all the rest of the next day to do that, because although I had to work, my husband didn't and our kids are still on school vacation until the day after New Year's. My husband got me a cd and dvd I wanted and I got him some Dr Who items that seemed to surprise him. I was glad when he wasn't home a few days earlier, when I had put them under our tree, and my 14 year old daughter accidentally dropped one of his wrapped, square packages, about he size of an apple and it shouted "Exterminate! Exterminate!" from inside its package!
Yesterday when we were low on groceries, I insisted that we finally go to Trader Joe's, because I hear so much about it, from people I trust. So I remembered a news article from about a year ago, saying there was one in the southern suburb of St. Louis Park, which is really nowhere near us. But I insisted anyway. So the four of us drove all the way down highway 100, found Trader Joes, bought frozen meals, cereal, chips, all off-brand, but all apparently organically grown or farmed. My husband grumbled, "This is all the same stuff they have at the Wedge Co Op," the whole time, and the cashier told me they've built two more, recently, in the suburbs of White Bear Lake, and Maple Grove, both much closer to me!
Today I had to take my little guy clothes shopping, because in the last month he has outgrown everything he owns, including his underpants and pajamas. He's been wearing my pajamas to bed and has been relegated to the few size 12 items he already owns. Every day I try on clothes that just fit him recently, and they don't now! I did something I've rarely done, in my life, and took him RETAIL clothes shopping. I took him to JC Penney's at the Rosedale Mall and shopped for size 12 boys pants and shirts and had him try them on in their fitting room, as opposed to buying what look to be size 12 clothes from the Unique Thrift Store and just hoping they fit him when I get them home. But the boys department didn't have pajamas over size 12 for some reason, and the men's department didn't have men's "small" size pajamas, so I bought my 8 year old son size medium men's pajamas. He's flopping around in them right now, watching Deathnote on tv with his sister.
I have tomorrow off from work. I'm going to stay home with my kids, and my husband's coworker's son. She could not find day care for him for just tomorrow, and he's so much like my son, and they're so close in age, that when he came to my son's birthday party last February, they hit it off like my son rarely does with anyone, and they snuck back awake again after everyone else had fallen asleep and snuck in to the basement and played video games all night. So, hopefully they'll have fun. I'm trying to convince my daughter to have a friend over as well, but she won't commit to that, right now.
My husband is putting in 16 to 20 hours of overtime at work, every week, and getting paid time and a half for it. But he knows it's all in preparation for his company quite possibly being bought soon, so he he's worried about his future there, after that. But mine's going the same as always. Same desk, same phone, I've literally had some of the same co workers for over 10 years now. I'm more of an escalation point or troubleshooter for the department this year, than a direct customer service rep, and I'm also not the team lead or supervisor this year, which I am thankful for, right now. Although quite a few people still call me that and act like I am.
The kids have had their baths. We're going to watch a new Mystery Science Theater dvd my husband recently bought on Amazon!
Most of their findings I already knew. He has a hard time sitting still, repeats himself, has a narrow range of interests, cries when the daily schedule is disrupted, and ignores people around him, including other children, often. But some of their findings such as some of his specific patterns of speech, his inability to figure out the meanings of figures of speech, and his anxiety of loud crowds I hadn't noticed at all until they all pointed it out to me. It made me mad because so often in the past I've tried to show some of his behaviors to his pediatrician, and was told he was just being a boy, or was making the mistake of comparing him to his sister. The school psychologist said she'd send a copy of their findings to his pediatrician to keep in his chart. I'd sort of preferred that they'd proven him right, though, than prove me right this time.
I was assured he'll be in the same class, take the same bus, his routine won't really change, but that by signing my agreement to allow him to participate in Special Education they can continue to provide all the same services they'd already been providing this year, but that the school district would be bound by law to continue to provide those services if any of them were replaced in their job at some point. And that we can meet again soon to develop an Individual Education Plan for him, that will apparently include giving him the right to leave class and have some designated place to go when the noise makes him too anxious, because apparently that was a major concern of all of theirs. In a way I feel very lucky about the school district, and the school that he is in. Some parents of some seriously disabled children have to fight for their child to have an I.E.P. We just got one handed to us.
Saturday Dec 22 we drove to Green Bay, and hit a blizzard half way there! Our usual 5 hour drive with both my husband I, both our children, and our shepherd mix dog in my Saturn Sedan, as great as my car now drives, took us 7 hours. So, we arrived Saturday night. But Christmas wasn't until Tuesday. My kids couldn't believe, then, that we had to go to their church on both Sunday AND the next day, which was Christmas Eve. Churches are rough on my son. He used to try to run away during it. Now he lays his head on my lap and pulls his coat up over his head. And I knitted a lot. I just finished knitting the last of my new 9 month old nephew's baby blanket when it was time for everyone to start opening presents.
At my in-laws', my husband and his 3 siblings and all their spouses draw one name from a bowl, and that's the one sibling they have to buy a present for. But everyone buys for my husband's mom and dad and for all the nieces and nephews. And his parents buy a lot for all their kids, kids' spouses, and grandchildren. My son got lots of Pokemon toys, and my daughter got a lot of shirts with dragons on them, and books of ghost stories. I got snowflake patterned pajamas, among some other things, and my husband got Green Bay Packers football shaped soap on a rope!
Wouldn't you know we hit another snow storm about half way back, Christmas night. We had to leave Christmas afternoon, because I had to work the next day. So our drive back took almost as long as our drive there. And, after we got back, my husband found that he had taken one of his father's boots rather than his own. They really did look a lot alike. But now he had two left boots, no right one, and his father's orthopedic insert, in one of them!
So we drove up to our own driveway at about 10:00 at night, and our kids got to open what we got them, the "big present" of which , this year, was a Nintendo Wii. They stayed up until 1 am trying to hook it up and play it. But they and my husband had all the rest of the next day to do that, because although I had to work, my husband didn't and our kids are still on school vacation until the day after New Year's. My husband got me a cd and dvd I wanted and I got him some Dr Who items that seemed to surprise him. I was glad when he wasn't home a few days earlier, when I had put them under our tree, and my 14 year old daughter accidentally dropped one of his wrapped, square packages, about he size of an apple and it shouted "Exterminate! Exterminate!" from inside its package!
Yesterday when we were low on groceries, I insisted that we finally go to Trader Joe's, because I hear so much about it, from people I trust. So I remembered a news article from about a year ago, saying there was one in the southern suburb of St. Louis Park, which is really nowhere near us. But I insisted anyway. So the four of us drove all the way down highway 100, found Trader Joes, bought frozen meals, cereal, chips, all off-brand, but all apparently organically grown or farmed. My husband grumbled, "This is all the same stuff they have at the Wedge Co Op," the whole time, and the cashier told me they've built two more, recently, in the suburbs of White Bear Lake, and Maple Grove, both much closer to me!
Today I had to take my little guy clothes shopping, because in the last month he has outgrown everything he owns, including his underpants and pajamas. He's been wearing my pajamas to bed and has been relegated to the few size 12 items he already owns. Every day I try on clothes that just fit him recently, and they don't now! I did something I've rarely done, in my life, and took him RETAIL clothes shopping. I took him to JC Penney's at the Rosedale Mall and shopped for size 12 boys pants and shirts and had him try them on in their fitting room, as opposed to buying what look to be size 12 clothes from the Unique Thrift Store and just hoping they fit him when I get them home. But the boys department didn't have pajamas over size 12 for some reason, and the men's department didn't have men's "small" size pajamas, so I bought my 8 year old son size medium men's pajamas. He's flopping around in them right now, watching Deathnote on tv with his sister.
I have tomorrow off from work. I'm going to stay home with my kids, and my husband's coworker's son. She could not find day care for him for just tomorrow, and he's so much like my son, and they're so close in age, that when he came to my son's birthday party last February, they hit it off like my son rarely does with anyone, and they snuck back awake again after everyone else had fallen asleep and snuck in to the basement and played video games all night. So, hopefully they'll have fun. I'm trying to convince my daughter to have a friend over as well, but she won't commit to that, right now.
My husband is putting in 16 to 20 hours of overtime at work, every week, and getting paid time and a half for it. But he knows it's all in preparation for his company quite possibly being bought soon, so he he's worried about his future there, after that. But mine's going the same as always. Same desk, same phone, I've literally had some of the same co workers for over 10 years now. I'm more of an escalation point or troubleshooter for the department this year, than a direct customer service rep, and I'm also not the team lead or supervisor this year, which I am thankful for, right now. Although quite a few people still call me that and act like I am.
The kids have had their baths. We're going to watch a new Mystery Science Theater dvd my husband recently bought on Amazon!