An 80's nostalgia email that I've received, in several incarnations, several times, over the years:
You remember when Jordache jeans were cool.
You wore anything Izod, especially those windbreakers that folded up into a
pouch you could wear around your waist.
In your fifth grade class picture you were wearing an Izod shirt with the
collar up.
You know the words to any Weird Al Yankovic song by heart.
You ever rang someone's doorbell and said, "Landshark".
Three words: "Atari", "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar?
You remember the days when "safe sex" meant that your parents were gone for
the weekend.
You remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV.
While in high school, you and your friends discussed elaborate plans to get
together at the end of the century and play Prince's "1999" until you passed
out from partying.
You remember when music that was labeled alternative, really was.
You took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini van. You rode in the
back of the station wagon and faced the cars behind you.
You've ever conversationally used the phrase "Jane, you ignorant slut."
You watched HR Puffenstuff as a child but now that you're older, you really
understand that it would have been much better had you known about drugs at
the time.
You've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the following phrases:
"When I was younger..."or "When I was your age..."or "You know, back when...".
"Schoolhouse Rock" played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the English
language.
You're starting to view getting carded to buy alcohol as a GOOD thing.
You ever dressed to emulate a person you saw in either a Duran Duran, Madonna
or Cyndi Lauper video.
You remember with pain the sad day when the "Green Machine" hit the streets
and made your old "Big Wheel" quite obsolete.
You honestly remember when film critics raved that no movie could ever
possibly get better special effects than those in the movie "TRON".
Girls thought Sean Cassidy was dreamy and lusted after Ted, the ship's
photographer, on "The Love Boat".
You freaked out when you found that you now fall into the "26 - 50" age
category on most questionnaires.
Your hair, at some point in time in the 80's, became something which can only
be
described by the phrase "I was experimenting".
You're doing absolutely nothing pertaining to your major.
You're starting to believe (now that it wouldn't affectYOU) that maybe having
the kids go to school year-round wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.
You ever wanted to be "gagged with a spoon".
U2 is too "popular" and "mainstream" for you now.
You ever used the phrase "kiss my grits" in conversation.
You ever remember trying to guess the episode of the Brady Bunch from the
first scene.
You spent endless nights dreaming about being the Bionic Woman or Wonder
Woman or the Six Million Dollar Man.
You had ringside seats for Luke and Laura's wedding on "General Hospital".
You remember "Hey, let's be careful out there".
You know who shot J.R.
Your parents wanted you to attend medical school but you decided it was
pointless since Quincy got all the babes anyway.
This rings a bell "...and my name is Charlie. They work for me."
You ever wanted to learn to play "Stairway To Heaven" on the guitar.
You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on, after all, look at Tab.
You know all the words to the double album set of Grease.
You ever had a Dorothy Hamill haircut.
You sat with your friends on a Friday night and dialed 867-5309 just to see
if Jenny
would answer.
"All skate, change directions" means something to you.
You owned a pair of rainbow suspenders just like Mork used to wear.
You bought a pair of Vaans and wanted to order a pizza in history class so you
could be just like Jeff Spicoli in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High".
You owned a preppy handbook.
You were too young to go see the "Blue Lagoon" so you just had to settle for
second hand reports.
You remember when there was only PG and R....none of this PG 13 crap.
You learned to swim about the same time "Jaws" came out and still carry the
emotional scars to this day.
You remember when your cable TV box had the three rows of numbers and you had
to move the selector switch accordingly.
You actually believed everything Leonard Nimoy told you on "In Search Of...".
The "ABC After School Special", "My Mom's Having A Baby", actually taught you
stuff you didn't know.
Your jaw would ache by the time you finished those 'brick-size' packages of
Bazooka gum. (I preferred "Hubba Bubba")
Bo and Luke Duke.
VCR's cost $1,000.
There was nothing strange about Bert and Ernie living together.
Rotary dial telephones.
You actually believed that Mikey, famed for his Life Cereal commercials, died
after eating a packet of "Pop Rocks" and drinking a Coke.
You searched all over for the jeans with glittery designs on the pockets.
You've ever eaten a candy ring, necklace, cigarette or whistle.
Gloria Vanderbilt stretch jeans were the height of fashion.
You prefer roller skates to roller blades.
You ever thought someone was cool because they had a "bendable" pencil. Or
because they had a mechanical pencil or painter's paints or parachute pants.
You ever had the poster of Farrah Fawcet-Majors in the one piece swimsuit.
Or had the Farrah Fawcet lunchbox or the Farrah binder or spiral notebook.
If you ever wore Garanimals. (Hey!! At least my clothes matched!!)
If the phrases "Na-nu Na-nu" or "Shazbatt!" mean anything to you.
If you ever secretly practiced your moon-walk.
If you ever argued over which was better...."Close Encounters" or "Star Wars".
You remember when HBO was new and they played "Gone With The Wind"about a
million times.
You remember when MTV was new and they played "Video Killed The Radio Star"
about a jillion times.
You ever thought Bonnie Tyler was a good singer.
You tried "Billy Beer".
You ever wanted a Ronco product or ever bought a K-Tel record.
You had to chew a red tablet after brushing your teeth to see how well you
did.
"I'm Chevy Chase and you're not...".
"Rock-Em Sock-Em Robots".
If you know the words to Steve Martin's song "King Tut" or ever
say......"Well,
excuuuuuuuuussse ME!"....or "I'm a WILD and CRAZY GUY!"
You ever "feathered" your hair.
If you ever even considered owning "Mood Rings" or "Pet Rocks".
If you remember when the televangelists were really concerned about dungeons
and dragons.
"Pacman", "Frogger" and "Centipede", friendship pins, colored hairspray,
Martian head bands and you can't get the word "like" out of your vocabulary.
This timeline appropriately describes actual events in your life:
"Star Wars" opens, you are just hitting the double digit ages and you think
the creatures are WAY cool.
"The Empire Strikes Back" opens, you are now in early double digit ages and
you are convinced that the special effects are much better, the characters are
WAY cooler and you want one of every collectible out there.
"Return Of The Jedi" hits the theatres.....you are now a full-blown teenager
and you cannot take your eyes off Princess Leia's breasts or Han Solo's butt.
The theme song to the "Greatest American Hero" still comes back to you on
occasion...."Believe it or not I am walking on air, I never thought I could be
so freeeee, Flying away on a wing and a prayer, Who could it be, Believe it or
not, it's just me".
You remember when Jordache jeans were cool.
You wore anything Izod, especially those windbreakers that folded up into a
pouch you could wear around your waist.
In your fifth grade class picture you were wearing an Izod shirt with the
collar up.
You know the words to any Weird Al Yankovic song by heart.
You ever rang someone's doorbell and said, "Landshark".
Three words: "Atari", "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar?
You remember the days when "safe sex" meant that your parents were gone for
the weekend.
You remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV.
While in high school, you and your friends discussed elaborate plans to get
together at the end of the century and play Prince's "1999" until you passed
out from partying.
You remember when music that was labeled alternative, really was.
You took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini van. You rode in the
back of the station wagon and faced the cars behind you.
You've ever conversationally used the phrase "Jane, you ignorant slut."
You watched HR Puffenstuff as a child but now that you're older, you really
understand that it would have been much better had you known about drugs at
the time.
You've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the following phrases:
"When I was younger..."or "When I was your age..."or "You know, back when...".
"Schoolhouse Rock" played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the English
language.
You're starting to view getting carded to buy alcohol as a GOOD thing.
You ever dressed to emulate a person you saw in either a Duran Duran, Madonna
or Cyndi Lauper video.
You remember with pain the sad day when the "Green Machine" hit the streets
and made your old "Big Wheel" quite obsolete.
You honestly remember when film critics raved that no movie could ever
possibly get better special effects than those in the movie "TRON".
Girls thought Sean Cassidy was dreamy and lusted after Ted, the ship's
photographer, on "The Love Boat".
You freaked out when you found that you now fall into the "26 - 50" age
category on most questionnaires.
Your hair, at some point in time in the 80's, became something which can only
be
described by the phrase "I was experimenting".
You're doing absolutely nothing pertaining to your major.
You're starting to believe (now that it wouldn't affectYOU) that maybe having
the kids go to school year-round wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.
You ever wanted to be "gagged with a spoon".
U2 is too "popular" and "mainstream" for you now.
You ever used the phrase "kiss my grits" in conversation.
You ever remember trying to guess the episode of the Brady Bunch from the
first scene.
You spent endless nights dreaming about being the Bionic Woman or Wonder
Woman or the Six Million Dollar Man.
You had ringside seats for Luke and Laura's wedding on "General Hospital".
You remember "Hey, let's be careful out there".
You know who shot J.R.
Your parents wanted you to attend medical school but you decided it was
pointless since Quincy got all the babes anyway.
This rings a bell "...and my name is Charlie. They work for me."
You ever wanted to learn to play "Stairway To Heaven" on the guitar.
You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on, after all, look at Tab.
You know all the words to the double album set of Grease.
You ever had a Dorothy Hamill haircut.
You sat with your friends on a Friday night and dialed 867-5309 just to see
if Jenny
would answer.
"All skate, change directions" means something to you.
You owned a pair of rainbow suspenders just like Mork used to wear.
You bought a pair of Vaans and wanted to order a pizza in history class so you
could be just like Jeff Spicoli in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High".
You owned a preppy handbook.
You were too young to go see the "Blue Lagoon" so you just had to settle for
second hand reports.
You remember when there was only PG and R....none of this PG 13 crap.
You learned to swim about the same time "Jaws" came out and still carry the
emotional scars to this day.
You remember when your cable TV box had the three rows of numbers and you had
to move the selector switch accordingly.
You actually believed everything Leonard Nimoy told you on "In Search Of...".
The "ABC After School Special", "My Mom's Having A Baby", actually taught you
stuff you didn't know.
Your jaw would ache by the time you finished those 'brick-size' packages of
Bazooka gum. (I preferred "Hubba Bubba")
Bo and Luke Duke.
VCR's cost $1,000.
There was nothing strange about Bert and Ernie living together.
Rotary dial telephones.
You actually believed that Mikey, famed for his Life Cereal commercials, died
after eating a packet of "Pop Rocks" and drinking a Coke.
You searched all over for the jeans with glittery designs on the pockets.
You've ever eaten a candy ring, necklace, cigarette or whistle.
Gloria Vanderbilt stretch jeans were the height of fashion.
You prefer roller skates to roller blades.
You ever thought someone was cool because they had a "bendable" pencil. Or
because they had a mechanical pencil or painter's paints or parachute pants.
You ever had the poster of Farrah Fawcet-Majors in the one piece swimsuit.
Or had the Farrah Fawcet lunchbox or the Farrah binder or spiral notebook.
If you ever wore Garanimals. (Hey!! At least my clothes matched!!)
If the phrases "Na-nu Na-nu" or "Shazbatt!" mean anything to you.
If you ever secretly practiced your moon-walk.
If you ever argued over which was better...."Close Encounters" or "Star Wars".
You remember when HBO was new and they played "Gone With The Wind"about a
million times.
You remember when MTV was new and they played "Video Killed The Radio Star"
about a jillion times.
You ever thought Bonnie Tyler was a good singer.
You tried "Billy Beer".
You ever wanted a Ronco product or ever bought a K-Tel record.
You had to chew a red tablet after brushing your teeth to see how well you
did.
"I'm Chevy Chase and you're not...".
"Rock-Em Sock-Em Robots".
If you know the words to Steve Martin's song "King Tut" or ever
say......"Well,
excuuuuuuuuussse ME!"....or "I'm a WILD and CRAZY GUY!"
You ever "feathered" your hair.
If you ever even considered owning "Mood Rings" or "Pet Rocks".
If you remember when the televangelists were really concerned about dungeons
and dragons.
"Pacman", "Frogger" and "Centipede", friendship pins, colored hairspray,
Martian head bands and you can't get the word "like" out of your vocabulary.
This timeline appropriately describes actual events in your life:
"Star Wars" opens, you are just hitting the double digit ages and you think
the creatures are WAY cool.
"The Empire Strikes Back" opens, you are now in early double digit ages and
you are convinced that the special effects are much better, the characters are
WAY cooler and you want one of every collectible out there.
"Return Of The Jedi" hits the theatres.....you are now a full-blown teenager
and you cannot take your eyes off Princess Leia's breasts or Han Solo's butt.
The theme song to the "Greatest American Hero" still comes back to you on
occasion...."Believe it or not I am walking on air, I never thought I could be
so freeeee, Flying away on a wing and a prayer, Who could it be, Believe it or
not, it's just me".
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home